Friday, 5 February 2010


So yeah, it's been an awfully long time since I've written a danged thing here. Like, since my birthday. Which was in August.


It's not like things have been tame, however.

After the birthday we started up yet another IVF cycle which, if you happened to check out my infertility blog, you'd know was a bust. Big, fat, huge bust. Very disappointing. I really thought that was our time, that come May of this year we'd finally have our bundle of joy. But alas...we have no joy, and the only bundle I see is the bundle of debt we keep adding to as we spin the wheel of infertility and keep turning up Whammies.

So that was August and September. October was rather crap, all things considered. Lots of time mourning what wasn't to be, as well as many a family birthday (wait - that wasn't crap) took up the bulk of our time.

November rolled around and with it came my latest challenge - National Novel Writing Month. As you can likely tell I enjoy the whole writing thing, so this was an opportunity to flex my creative muscle and finally do something just for me. NaNoWriMo involves writing 50,000 words during the 30 days that make up November. That's about 1,667 words per day, if you're averaging it out. Which I most certainly did.

I'm exceedingly happy to report that I did, indeed, complete the challenge, and that by November 29th, I'd submitted what I'd written for word verification and I clocked in at 50,330-something words. I'd done it!

What I haven't done is finish the book.

Believe it or not, I literally haven't opened that Word file again since I got my wee winners badge. I dropped my main characters like literary hot potatoes, and they've sat there, stagnant, for well over two months. Poor things. I really should get back to it, because I was nowhere near done. And I'd really like to be done, ya know? To finish what I started. And, horrors, to let other people read it and see what they think.

At the end of the day, even if I never write another word or if I actually do finish it and people hate it, I'll be just fine. For me, the biggest rationale behind even starting this in the first place was the challenge aspect. To finish. I haven't done anything even remotely artistic in months if not years, and this couldn't have come at a better time to help both distract me from the events of the previous few months and focus me on a singular task. And it was all good.

Except for the actual writing. I have no idea if it's any good or if it's complete, abject crap. Guess only time and critics will tell. If I ever finish the danged thing!

So that was November. Then we all flew headlong into December. I got right into Christmas this year...the baking, the decorating, the shopping, the music, the wrapping, the tree...I was Christmas obsessed. We hosted a lovely Christmas dinner with my family that went from civilized to disaster as cats, dog, and small children collided in a frenzy of presents, smushy faces, smudged chocolate and flying red wine. All over our recently cleaned off-white carpet.

But that's a whole other blog post. Merry Christmas to all.

We rang in the new year with four of our friends playing Wii and eating yummy nibblies. And then it was 2010.

If you've read anything I've written during a winter month, you know how much I abhor the cold and white season. I detest snow, get nervous about Hubs having to drive around in bad weather (even though he's an excellent driver - it's all the other buttholes I worry about), and hate standing on that wind tunnel of a GO train platform waiting for my tin can of germs to shuttle me along the lakeshore to my downtown Toronto workplace.

But truthfully? How can anyone complain about this winter? Hardly any snow, reasonably mild temps (give or take a day here and there) and every day we're one day closer to spring. Even I can't justify ranting and raving this time around.

January is that long, dark month that hurts in so many ways. It's dark when you leave home to go to work and dark when you leave your office at night. It's when the holiday bills start rolling in, and it's when they start taking the CPP and EI off your cheques again, so you're poorer than you were only a month before. And those credit card bastards still expect you to pay up. The nerve. So needless to say we've been feeling the pinch these past few weeks.

And here we are in February. I like means January's over, it's a short month so it's not like we have to put up with it for all that long, and there's Valentine's Day squished in there for good measure. Not that we'll be fete-ing it up this year (see above paragraph re: finances) but I do have a special gift for Hubs that I'm sure he'll love, and we'll find our own low cost way to celebrate the day one way or another.

Today in particular is a very good day. It was three years ago today that we got the keys to our first home. Hard to believe it's been three whole years already, but we're still delighted with the house and have no plans whatsoever to make any move.

Today also marks the very last day of Hubs' classes. That's right - he's been in school each week since April 27 of last year, and as of today he's done the classroom stuff and bright and early Monday morning he begins his placement.

It's a day for celebrating indeed. He's worked so hard and has done incredibly well, and as trite as it sounds, I'm really proud of him. He's so cut out for what he's going into I can't wait to see how it all unfolds for him. He's got eight weeks of placement and then it's all over and he'll hopefully be back in the working world, making a difference in so many lives.

So yes, right now every day is not only one day closer to spring, it's also one day closer to Hubs having a pay cheque. Bring it on!

And there you have it...we've caught up on five months of activity in one short blog post. I'm going to do my best to try to write more frequently but hey, we all know I've said that before and have been less than stellar at keeping my word. Maybe this time it will be different!!

Besides...I'd be surprised if anyone was even reading anymore! :)

And that's your daily dash. How's your diva doin'?

Sunday, 23 August 2009

It's my birfday

And oh boy, have I been spoiled rotten!

An entire weekend of birthday festivities started Friday night when Hubs gave me some beaaautiful flowers. Pink gerberas, lilies, white and pink roses - just to die for.

Saturday morning we got up at a decent time, grabbed a Timmie's and headed to the theatre to see The Time Traveler's Wife. I'd read the book and was a bit meh about it, but wanted to see the movie either way - see whether the hype was worth it. It was okay. I cried at the end, of course, but that's pretty much par for the course for me right now. I cry over everything - love the drugs.

Later that evening we met up with friends and family for sushi and had a fantastic meal. I was stuffed! But managed to shovel some birthday cake in after we went back to our place. I was spoiled rotten (to the point of incredulity, really) and was feeling very fortunate to have so many wonderful people in my life to celebrate with.

Today I slept in, then Hubs made me an incredible breakfast that would rival any Denny's slam. My fab SIL went above and beyond yet again, so thanks to her I then went for a divine mani/pedi and even got silly little flowers done on my big toes.

Fingers still drying, Hubs, DeeDee and I got into the car and headed out to this elaborate mini golf place I'd seen about 45 minutes from home. Even though it wasn't our weekend with her, DeeDee phoned this morning and said she wanted to spend some time with her dad, so of course we were happy to have her join us. When she got here she handed me a pink gift bag, with the word "MOM" printed on it. Underneath it, in read pen, she'd written "#2. Your awesome. And special".

Well, my diva heart melted. How sweet was that? She even made a card for me with a picture of herself in it. So cute. I was really touched.

We then engaged in a surprisingly cutthroat game of mini golf, and I'm pleased to report that I emerged victorious - by one stroke. Ah, victory. Takes almost as sweet as my yummy birthday cake.

Golfed out, we returned home and dropped DeeDee off so she could have some pizza and watch a movie with her Auntie while Hubs and I dined in celebration at the Keg. Yet again, gift cards courtesy of my fab sister in law. Took them two tries to get our steaks right, but when they do - there's nothin' like 'em.

Now we've watched Big Brother and True Blood, had another piece of birthday cake (after I blew out more candles and heard more singing), done my IVF drugs for the night, and I have but 9 minutes more to stay awake to officially be 36 years old seeing as I was born at 10:41 pm.

I'm very very sleepy, but surely I can squeeze out another 9 minutes?

And that's your daily dash. How's your diva doin'?

Wednesday, 19 August 2009

The working sick

We've all played this game once or twice (at least) in our lifetimes. You wake up, feel like abject crap, you're hacking up a lung...and you have to make that game day decision. Stay in bed, or go to work? If you're like me, the vast majority of the time, you solider on, shower and dress, and head on into the office.

You hack and you sneeze and you drop your snotty Kleenexes on the GO train.

You sit in the cubicle not too far from my office and I wince every time you begin the barking noises that emanate from what is surely a now raw, painful throat.

I feel terribly sorry for you - that can't feel good! You should be sleeping, resting, getting better.

I mentally tell you to go home.

Get the rest you need.

And keep your filthy germs to yourself. I can't afford to get sick right now, dangit!

The working sick - damned if you do, damned if you don't.

Every corporate culture is different, but generally speaking, I find there's a strange reward system in place for coming in to work sick. You're a trooper, you're sticking it out, look at you, feeling so bad but still managing to come in. There, there. So dedicated.

So infectious.

On the other hand, when you do decide it's best to keep your bubonic carcass home and in bed, you're almost chastised for not being strong enough to tough it out. Sure, you're at home resting which means you'll probably get better faster and be back to your productive self sooner AND you're not risking the health of everyone else around you...but, sigh, Jane made it in. Why couldn't you?

I've been pretty lucky lately. I used to pick up every little virus or bacteria under the sun. I'd have colds and flus all the time, but that's tapered off significantly and now, I'm all about the ear infections. Fun, but not necessarily contagious.

I had this internal debate just yesterday morning as I awoke from a delightful slumber and put my feet to the floor. I felt like crap. My ears were completely blocked, my head was swimming, and my voice was reverberating inside my head. The latter I discovered upon actually speaking to Hubs - fret not, I didn't get echoes from my internal morning monologue. I'm not that crazy.


Alas, I felt brutal. Run down, nasty, just didn't want to move.

But what did I do?

Got up, soldiered on, showered and dressed, and made my way into the office. But man oh man would I have loved to have just.stayed.home.

I only made it until 1:45pm, then headed out to catch an early train so I could flake on my couch.

And I'm back at work again today. Still not feeling great, but not bad enough to mentally justify staying home. And I have the pleasure of listening to some poor co-worker who totally should have stayed home today hack up a lung. Maybe two, it's that bad.

I honestly don't even know who it is - I just know that I want to stay as far away from her as is humanly possible. 'Cause I'd really rather not add a nasty cough to my already miserable ears on the best of days. And certainly not three days before I'm supposed to start IVF.

So, what's life like where you work? Are you encouraged to actually stay home when you're sick so you can recover faster (thereby getting back to productivity faster) and not take the rest of the office down with you? Or are you forced to function in one of those environments where the phlegm-ier you are, the more kudos you receive? I'm willing to bet most of us fall into column b, but I'm interested to see your responses.

And that's your daily dash. How's your diva doin'?




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