Tuesday, 23 September 2008

Baby Mama?

Interesting title, I know. It works in two ways - one, because for the first time in, uh, ever, I have a real shot of being Hubs' baby mama. And two, because we just watched the movie of the same name.

I heart Tina Fey, truly I do. But given all we'd been through, this was one theatrical release that I had to forgo. If Knocked Up taught me anything, it was that seeing baby/pregnancy related flicks while being infertile is highly discouraged. Big time.


But today was the one day where I thought I could view this little baby bump of a film and actually be okay about it. And fortunately, I was right.

Yes, today was transfer day. Two beautiful, high grade blastocysts were delivered to the proverbial 'sweet spot' of my uterus at 11:03am. So sayeth my doctor, and boy am I inclined to believe him.

Two weeks from now we'll find out if it worked, but in the meantime I can float in this bliss bubble for a week at least, before I start peeing on things to see if I can get an early test result. And so I allowed Baby Mama into my bubble.

It was good, had some pretty laugh out loud moments, but the ending, as expected, was meh. But what could she do? Forced into a corner, she pumped out her Hollywood ending and there was much rejoicing. And I'm not giving anything away to those that have yet to see it, trust me.

Back to me as baby mama now. Hubs and I went out for dinner tonight thanks to some Outback steakhouse gift certificates CJ had given me for my birthday. We had a fantastic meal and chatted a lot about what our new future might mean, what changes to expect, what we were both excited and scared about.

At this point, quite frankly I'm most scared that I'm jinxing us by even having these conversations. That merely talking about it as something that could happen is enough to anger the universe that's been so cruel to us in the past. But for tonight, all second thoughts were shoved aside and there was meat to be ingested. All in all, a lovely evening.

So cross your fingers, toes, whathaveyou that little eenie and meenie (Hubs' names for our embryos) are snuggling in nice and tight to the cushy lining I've been busting my hump to keep plump for them since they were merely eggs and sperm. Only five days old and I'm already complaining about the work necessary to keep a roof over (and under) their heads.

I'm going to do my everything to think positively, to visualize this actually happening, to picture those embryos latching on, getting bigger day by day, and one day becoming the son or daughter we've craved all these years.

'Cause even if it's only for two weeks (or as long as my bliss bubble remains intact) I will always be baby mama to eenie and meenie. I'll always have that.

And that's your daily dash. How's your diva doin'?

18 comments on "Baby Mama?"

Mrs. Spaghetti Bender on 24 September 2008 at 07:25 said...

Since I got my wish on my bday I'll pass on more of my bday wishes to you for eenie and meenie to snuggle in nice and tight to your warm walls.

Good luck!

Anonymous said...

I've been quietly following your story on here, and WB, for a while now and just wanted to send you all the good luck vibes I could. Enjoy the bliss, focus on the "here and now" and keep the positive energy flowing. You deserve this SO much!! I'll be thinking of you! :)

Marlene on 24 September 2008 at 08:36 said...

I'm crossing everything and sending all kinds of Baby Mama vibes!

Anonymous said...

Oh Diva, I haven't posted in a long time but I've been keeping up with things here & on WB. Just wanted to let you know that I'm thinking of you & crossing my fingers for you & DH. :)


Ms. Homeowner on 24 September 2008 at 15:08 said...

Stick, beans, STICK!!!!!!

Tatiana said...

I'm thinking all sorts of baby thoughts and sending all kind of baby vibes in your general direction.

Anonymous said...

I have everything crossed for you guys, you deserve to be a baby Mamma! I'm sending all my good baby vibes your way. I hope the next two weeks go quickly for you :)

Janny on 25 September 2008 at 10:14 said...

I know I'm a tad late and all, but you know everything is crossed and all good vibes are headed your way from O-Town!! :) Oh, and I LOVE the names your hubby gave them! So sweet! :)

Anonymous said...

Good luck! I've got everything possible crossed for you! Hang in there eenie and meenie! You're going to have the best mother ever!

Anonymous said...

Another WB/BB Mama following your story quietly and rooting for you. Best of luck, I'll be thinking of you.

grimeysgal on 25 September 2008 at 22:12 said...

I'm soooo unbelievably excited for you and HUBS and I'm keeping everything crossed that your little embys stay put and grow big and strong!
Take care!

Anonymous said...

I wanted to pass on sticky vibes and wish you all the BEST luck in the world for you and DH :) I really hope this dream comes true for you. Charlene (wb)

Anonymous said...

Having followed your story for some time and had my own IVF miracle, I am really, really thinking positive thoughts for you at this time.
I really tried to keep myself busy during the 2ww from the transfer and I actually never took a hpt - just waited for the clinic to give me the results!
I will be awaiting the test results with baited breath!! Best of luck!!!!!

Kermit from WB said...

Oh Diva, I hope they stick!
Enjoy this bliss, and here's hoping it continues for a long time to come :)

Anonymous said...

Ever finger and toe I have is crossed and every thought/prayer/wish is coming your way!!


Anonymous said...

Been following your story as well on WB and I am rooting for you. You and your husband sound like such wonderful people. Eenie and meenie are already so lucky!


Anonymous said...

Hoping Eenie and Meenie make you the Mummy you have always wanted to be! Sending lots of sticky vibes for 2 healthy beautiful babies!

Roberta on 30 September 2008 at 12:56 said...

Everything is crossed for you, and I am sending you all sorts of positive vibes. I am also stalking you totally and completely by every technological means that I have easy access to.
Good luck.




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